When we think about marriage, we have so many things to say and we do have so many definitions. Here, we will be focusing on four major biblical principles of marriage. God’s design for marriage is divine, and He ordained it and found it good. As we meditate on it more, we could easily find the hidden specks of dirt in our relationships more clearly and get rid of it for a more better life.
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God’s design for marriage
God designed marriage as a commitment and partnership between a man and a woman. Each sharing the yoke equally as they walk together through life. Each should fully submit to God and each other.
Fellowship with God and each other
In the beginning, God made man from the dust of the ground and breathed life into him, and he became a living being. Then God found it is not good for the man to be alone and he made a helper suitable for him. God made the woman from the rib He had taken out of the man. And when God brought her to the man, he rejoiced in her, and he was not ashamed to praise her. He said,
“This is now bone of my bones and flesh of my flesh; she shall be called ‘woman,’ for she was taken out of man.” Genesis 2:23 NIV
Everything was in order and peace as they were fully obeying the words of their creator, and they were happy. But the crafty enemy came and sowed the seeds of unbelief, greediness, and disobedience to the word of God.
And when God asked Adam the reason for his disobedience, he accused the woman. Sin entered their marriage life through disobedience. Genesis 3:1-12
We all know that Case 1 is the ideal marriage, which we all dream about and always wish to have in life. Case 1 is possible if you can resist the enemy and his evil tactics.
As we try to understand God’s design for marriage, we should not forget that the first marriage which was ordained by God encountered the first problem when the focus was shifted. And the same scenario and the same tactics are still being used by the enemy to destroy families. As believers, we should always seek God’s word and His will to continue to enjoy His fellowship in our life.
When we submit to the sovereign power of God, we are not just submitting, but we are building a mighty wall of protection around us.
Return to your first love
“I know your deeds, your hard work, and your perseverance. I know that you cannot tolerate wicked people, that you have tested those who claim to be apostles but are not, and have found them false. You have persevered and have endured hardships for my name, and have not grown weary. Yet I hold this against you: You have forsaken the love you had at first. Consider how far you have fallen! Repent and do the things you did at first. If you do not repent, I will come to you and remove your lampstand from its place.” Revelation 2:2-5
The church at Ephesus worked hard for the Lord, they couldn’t tolerate wicked people, and they endured hardships for the Lord but the Lord says – they have forsaken the love they had first…
And the Lord asks them to REPENT and do the things they did first.
What did God want from us?
“One of them, an expert in the law, tested him with this question: “Teacher, which is the greatest commandment in the Law?”Jesus replied: “‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment.” Mathew 22:35-38
So, how can we love Him with all our heart, soul and mind?
“If you love me, keep my commands. And I will ask the Father, and he will give you another advocate to help you and be with you forever–the Spirit of truth.” John 14:15-17
God wants His children to serve Him out of obedience and love.
And if we truly love Him, we must obey His commandments. It is easy for us to do what “we want” but to do what “God wants” we need the power of the Holy Spirit.
God ordained marriage, and we need His presence to experience divine peace and love in marriage. Praying more, trusting him more, and relying him on every single need will change our marriage for His glory.
Removing Idols of the Heart
I know God hates idols but it is also something that hurts Him most… As a loving father disciplines children, our heavenly Father disciplines us. It can also create a barrier in our lives to receive the blessing from God.
“In the ninth year of Hoshea, the king of Assyria captured Samaria and deported the Israelites to Assyria. He settled them in Halah, in Gozan on the Habor River and in the towns of the Medes. All this took place because the Israelites had sinned against the LORD their God, who had brought them up out of Egypt from under the power of Pharaoh king of Egypt.
They worshiped other gods and followed the practices of the nations the LORD had driven out before them, as well as the practices that the kings of Israel had introduced. The Israelites secretly did things against the LORD their God that were not right.
From watchtower to fortified city they built themselves high places in all their towns. They set up sacred stones and Asherah poles on every high hill and under every spreading tree. At every high place, they burned incense, as the nations whom the LORD had driven out before they had done. They did wicked things that aroused the LORD’s anger. They worshiped idols, though the LORD had said, “You shall not do this.” 2 Kings 17:6-12
Even today, the enemy makes us disobey God’s commandment- no other God’s before me in many ways.
As the children of God, we must be alert on:
- guarding our heart
- mindful of our time
- attitude of mind
- the renewal of mind
- attaining perfection in Christ
When we are eager to live our life for the glory of God, mindful of the evil tactics of the enemy, continually renewing in the attitude of our minds- then we can boldly say-
“The LORD is my light and my salvation– whom shall I fear? The LORD is the stronghold of my life– of whom shall I be afraid? When the wicked advance against me to devour me, it is my enemies and my foes who will stumble and fall. Though an army besiege me, my heart will not fear; though war breaks out against me, even then I will be confident.” Psalm 27:1-3
Is removing idols is important to achieve the purpose of God’s design in your marriage? Yes, it is!
Idols can be anything that draws away our attention from God. It can be work, money, person, even an attitude or anything to which we are obsessed on.
If we are ready to remove idols from our lives and come near to God, He will come near to us and dwell in our midst.
Love and submission in marriage
We all know about love and submission, but married women hate this word “Submit”. Why is it so??? I mainly write about marriage, biblical submission in marriage, ways to strengthen marriage, how to love husband unconditionally, and enjoying a healthy relationship with the spouse. People say its counter-cultural but God is the same yesterday, today and forever.
Heaven and earth will pass away, but His words will never pass away Mathew 24:35
God created everything in order, and He ordained families to enjoy unity, love, and fellowship.
So, what is the secret?
God created woman to be the best companion for man, to be the one who helps him for all his needs. She was not created to be ruled over, but to be united with him in love.
God’s design for marriage: Attitude towards Wife
- Loving as Christ loved
- Accepting as Christ accepted
- Spiritually cleansing with God’s word
- Love as he loves himself
God’s design for marriage: Attitude towards Husband
- Submit to husband
- Respect husband
God’s design for marriage is for experiencing true love and companionship. But we should never forget that the enemy prowls around like a roaring lion to sow the seeds of disobedience. Marriage life is difficult, and we need the grace of God to take each step vigilantly.
May God help us all to enjoy fellowship with God, love Him will all our heart, mind, and soul, removing all the idols of our heart, and drawing His presence in our lives.
For more tips on growing your marriage in Christ, be sure to also read
- 19 Encouraging Bible Verses for a Troubled Marriage
- How to Grow During the Storms of Marriage
- 16 Characteristics of a Godly Marriage